What Is Important?

Some days... well, I just feel like I am juggling alot of balls all at once. My days are busy, between my business, my son, my routines of sewing, gardening, cooking, housecleaning, whatever. I have my own worries in life. And to relax - I just might cruise around some blogs - and then feel VERY un-artistic. When, really I would like to feel artistic. Why can't I make my blog look like a magazine spread? Why am I still using old fabrics instead of the latest and greatest? Why can't I get better photos? Why can't I cook more creative food? If only I had 48 hours in every day instead of 24. I must keep my eye on my own prize - my life, my family, what I AM able to accomplish.

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I accept things the way they are... and have no regrets. Because if you are always dreaming of tomorrow, you just might forget to hug today. And truthfully, I sort-ov wish I could hug and hug today forever and make it stay. Because today... well today I am my little son's hero and he loves me so much. And it takes so little effort, really - just lots of love and patience! And to remember that time is fleeting so for heaven's sake - put aside whatever it is that I am doing that I think is so important and go have some fun together! Parenting articles always seem to tell you - take time for yourself. I have very little time for "myself" unless a shower counts? And I do like to go bike riding by myself. But mostly, for me, "my" time is having fun with him.

Because right now, in this moment in time... Because... well, because I am taking the time to fly a kite with my son. He runs across the field and shouts - "this is fun, Momma!". Priceless! And I run next to him while he rides his bike on the real road (love my new sneakers - Momma's need a treat once in awhile too). "Don't worry Momma, don't worry - I am being careful". Wobble, wobble, wobble. And then have to go to the store because I lost the sunscreen and we both need it. And bugspray - because for some reason all the bug spray got squirted ON the bugs (to kill them) and the "pet" snails and slugs (so the bugs wouldn't bite them). The cooler I need today has been converted into a slug condo so will have to be washed out. And I wait in line so he can ride 3X around a field in a horsecart at a street festival. I buy him mini gardening gloves at the Dollar Store so he can weed the flower bed without getting rashes on his hands - that keeps him busy while I mow the lawn to keep the mosquitoes at bay. Help him change his clothes several times because he is playing in the sprinkler. We are putting together a model. We draw pictures together. Meals (and snacks) must be on time or the world will fall apart (we always have a small cooler of snacks in the car) - trust me on this one! We make brownies past bedtime (Shhh - we miss bedtime on non-school nights). A quick clean up of the days mess. And by the time he is in bed, I am so tired. And for some reason - my house also looks like constant chaos. Ah, but that garden bed is looking pretty spiffy!

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BUT I don't want to ever forget the joy in these simple things... so I take my photos along the way... when the camera battery is charged. Because sometimes, just sometimes, my camera charger plug gets unplugged to charge some very important toy. Phooey!

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Please, I don't want to ever forget these days... when he accidentally let go of his kite and went tearing across the field to get it - successfully! When we went to the zoo yesterday - last time we went to a zoo he was a baby - and what was his favorite thing? Feeding the baby ducks corn (25 cents a handful), and petting the sheep - he had never seen a sheep before. Oh wait - I take that back - we spent a good hour picking up duck feathers on the ground and today he spent a good hour making a book of his feathers. Or maybe it was the child's map they gave to him... he loved referring to that. Oh, and when he ran along side the zoo staff lugging a bucket of meat to feed the lions... "what kind of meat are you feeding them (moose) - "oh, do they like moose better than humans?" He is so funny and happy and lively and full of energy and questions - and funny without meaning to be (because he really thinks he is asking a serious question).

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This week he will be six. I will never be able to get newborn, 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5 back. We are headed into SIX. I have loved each and every stage of his life so far! I know I am not the perfect parent, but I really do try my best. I have to take deep breathes and remind myself to be calm - MANY times. It really is a concious effort sometimes and fortunately - he never seems to notice a 10 second lag. Those 10 second lags have allowed me to carry on calmly. Because really, in the big scheme of things - all the messes along the way don't really matter. And somehow, despite my worst fears (call me Nervous Nelly - I just don't want anything bad to happen to him), he is still here, in one piece. The smile on his face, his pure joy, his cuddles and spending this time together with him now, that is what is important.

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P.S. - He is wearing he 1st ever T-shirt I've made (at the zoo). See, I actually do get some sewing done!