Recovering from Stage 4 cancer

I am still here. Here is a photo of me last week. Took me forever to figure out my password when Blogger changed to Google sign ins and at the time I did not have a Google email. Cancelled phone numbers, forgotten passwords, a new device. I mean, we are talking almost 2 years here. It was just impossible to get back into the system. But I was finally successful tonight. Yay! Because I have missed you all. Big hugs.

It is ok. I had other things on my mind. Stage 3 cancer that went to Stage 4. I was not supposed to loose my hair on that 2nd round of chemo, but I did.

I got the "chemo cut" when my long hair started coming out in gobs.

Which went to this. 2nd round of chemo, which was Folfox in a lovely little port that never let me down from September 2017 to April 2018. Not so great in the winter because it makes you extremely sensitive to the cold. I mean, so bad you can not even bare eating ice cream. So it has been 1 year since chemo.

All selfies.

The radiation, chemo operation thing. Another emergency surgery. Infection. Liver failure due to strong antibiotics. 53 days in the hospital for round 1, no kidding.  Pretty much off internet/tv because the screens hurt my eyes. Besides, I do not want to read sympathy, or "how are you?" because I was sick. And I certainly did not to hear for me to go to India, stand on my head and drink yaks' milk for a sure cure.  Definitely off social media, which is how I forgot to get into everything at this time. Rectal cancer which is getting more and more common in younger ages. I have no more rectum, I am missing parts of my colon and a slice out of my lungs, but serious digestive issues, which makes me weak. I tire easily and it is hard to gain weight.

Less than a year later I have a Met to my lung. VAT surgery at Mass General, which was HARD to recover from. Fortunately, my son and I are now living with my sister and she has a stair master because she is an amputee. My niece flew in that summer to help with the taking care of, taxi driving and feeding of my son, so I can rest. I have lots of family support.

Seriously, I wish I would have known I would be so sick. I went to University full time for that semester and worked part time. And continued to loose weight at an alarming rate so by Thankgiving I was under 100 pounds and could not hold my head up at night. Who knew we had such heavy heads? But, I am finally coming back. Figuring out how to log into this account only proves it. I am so excited.

But, I am really here. I am coming back with the ups, the downs, precious moments in life. I have recorded so much and need to figure out YouTube. I have fun places I have gone, fun things I have made. Plans. I have so much to share!

But for now, I just wanted to say hi. I am leaving you with a fun picture of Irene and me walking the dogs,  Tootsie and Lola in October on an unusually nice day! Irene and her husband have been instrumental in my care while also helping me with my teenaged son. Send them some love! Xo  I am holding Toots and Irene has Lola.